CRG Bests Bleeding Heartland

After suffering a 3-point loss to the Bleeding Heartland Roller Girls’ Flatliners just one month before, the Cincinnati Rollergirls’ Black Sheep exacted revenge with a crushing 185-point win on Saturday, April 6. Tank has a recap.

People love zombies right now. Seriously, The Walking Dead is pulling in double-digit ratings. More horrible zombie movies are being released at this time more then ever before, like Brad Pitt’s World War Z. Why is he being chased by a large Katamari Damacy ball of zombies?
But let’s face it, a large portion of our nation loves zombies. Zombies are scary because at some point there’s going to be more than one. They attack in hordes. The same way the #38 Cincinnati Rollergirls’ pack play is in the first two games of the home season. The players are swarming to opposing team’s jammers and not letting up. This unrelenting attack puts a physical toll on opposing point scorers as well as a mental one as they know they are going to get lit up every time they take the line.
The Violent Lambs are just that: Violent. They faced off Saturday in a rematch against the Code Blue Assassins and won, 187-157. A month ago, CBA scored a 30-point win over the Lambs in their house. Cherry Choke was smart as a bullwhip in her pack play. Hot Slice is back and she is fired up. It was fun watching her skate back and forth on the line making the defense wonder where she was going. A few seconds later, she had lead jammer. Mirderher is doing some fantastic work with the Lambs, using her brawn and speed to smash opposing jammers into submission.
There were a lot of jammer penalties in this game, which saw both teams benefit from power jams. The big difference, though, was that the Lambs were usually able to stop the Assassin’s jammers and keep them stuck in the pack. And when the Assassins would get lead jammer, Cincy’s D would force them to call off jams before the Lambs jammers could start scoring. They ended up winning the game by the same amount CBA beat them by the month before. I can’t make this stuff up, people.
For the second game in a row, Cincinnati’s Black Sheep came out of the gate and played their game, this time winning 358-173. Sailor Scary’s name is fitting. Remember in the movie Major League when Ricky Vaughn is at spring training and throws a 96 mph fastball and breaks a sign? That is Scary right now. Her penalties were high, but she is doing what this defense uses as a spear tip, hitting people. Hard. The more time she gets in this system, the better she is going to be.
K. Lethal is dancing her way through these packs like Babydoll in the movie Suckerpunch, racking up a whopping 239 points on Saturday. Also the Black Sheep are mixing up their packs with equal parts blocking and heavy hitters. In one jam, the Irish Landmine Jungle Lacy and the league’s long hair trendsetter, Penn Tupanga, were outmatched 2 to 1 in the pack. They held the opposing jammer in for 45 seconds. That is incredible play by those two.
June with a Cleaver went out of this game with an injury. When I saw her outside after the game, I offered to help walk her over to her car. She said she was OK and hopped on her good foot to her ride. Four days later, she goes to the doctor and they tell her she has a broken fibula. Heal up fast, Junie. I bet you are going to be back sooner then later.
Both the Lambs and Sheep have now improved to 2-1 on the season. This weekend, the Black Sheep travel to Florida, home of alligators, Pitbull, and a dude who smoked bath salts and ate another guy’s face. They will play #47 Tallahassee on Saturday night and #40 Jacksonville on Sunday night.
How will this team perform outside of the comfort historic Cincinnati Gardens? Will they continue to use their violent strategy to abuse the Florida teams’ jammers? Can they find their first road win(s) of the year? Will Buckhead Betty steal an airboat and drive back to Cincinnati? No matter what happens, I will have the answers to these questions and a preview of the CRG vs. Killamazoo game on April 27 at the historic Cincinnati Gardens in my next article.
-Tank
P.S. I really hope that Betty does snatch an airboat.


Cincinnati Violent Lambs vs. Bleeding Heartland Code Blue Assassins Stats

TOP SCORERS
Violent Lambs
Ruthless Chris – 82 (5.13 points per jam)
Bombtrack – 63 (5.73 points per jam)
Code Blue Assassins
Biscuit Cutter – 54 (3.6 points per jam)
Bipolar Curves – 48 (4.8 points per jam)
TOP BLOCKERS (based on combined offensive/defensive actions)
Violent Lambs
Cherry Choke – 18
Juwana Hurt – 15
La Bruja – 14
Code Blue Assassins
Mersadist – 18
Mauls Dolls – 16
Manda Runyon – 13
PENALTY MINUTES
Violent Lambs – 25
Code Blue Assassins – 17


Cincinnati Black Sheep vs. Bleeding Heartland Flatliners Stats

TOP SCORERS
Black Sheep
K. Lethal – 239 (13.28 points per jam)
Wheezy – 119 (7 points per jam)
Flatliners
Kaka Caliente – 77 (7 points per jam)
Nuck L. Sammie – 56 (5.6 points per jam)
Terror d’Bits – 28 (3.11 points per jam)
TOP BLOCKERS (based on combined offensive/defensive actions)
Black Sheep
Buckhead Betty – 12
Penn Tupanga – 11
Hannah Barbaric – 11
Nuk’em – 10
Flatliners
Shifty McGee – 14
Bobby McGuillotine – 13
Pele’s Melee – 13
Shock ‘n’ Roll – 12
PENALTY MINUTES
Black Sheep – 26
Flatliners – 29