In one of the most anticipated games of the 2013 Cincinnati Rollergirls season, CRG will battle Bloomington’s Bleeding Heartland Roller Girls in a grudge match on Saturday, April 6 at the Cincinnati Gardens. Tank has a preview.
The first rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about Fight Club. The second rule of Fight Club is you DO NOT talk about Fight Club. The third rule of….
Wait, that’s not it. That’s Fight Club.
This is the truth of it. Fighting leads to killing, and killing gets to warring. And that was damn near the death of us all. Look at us now, busted up and everyone talking about hard rain. But we’ve learned by the dust of them all. Bartertown’s learned. Now when men get to fighting, it happens here. And it finishes here. Two men enter, one man leaves.
No, wait a second, that’s Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome. You know the one where Tina Turner is the villain and for some reason the Gyro Captain from Mad Max 2: Road Warrior is now another pilot that Max doesn’t recognize?
Luke, I am your father.
Look people, what I am trying to say is this. On March 2, the Bleeding Heartland Roller Girls’ B team, the Code Blue Assassins, beat the Violent Lambs by 30 point and their A team, The Flatliners, beat the Black Sheep by 3 points in Bloomington, Indiana. Now just a hair over a month later, these four teams will meet in a double-header grudge match emanating live from the historic Cincinnati Gardens.
This will be a much tougher match up for both Cincinnati squads then NEO Roller Derby was for either. Bleeding Heartland is a strong, up-and-coming league that played Cincinnati tightly in a scrimmage last year and now nearly beat them this year. Cincinnati definitely has a home floor advantage in this one, as few teams are prepared for the crowd size and noise at the Gardens. It is not any easy house to play in.
Skaters to watch in this one include Juwana Hurt. She had some good hits in the last game that stopped opposing jammers and forced them to be recycled into the pack. Pistol Whippin’ Wendy is playing well and is rocking brand new Cyclops-from-X-Men-meets-an-Olympic-skier’s-goggles glasses. At this point, I am scared that if she takes them off she will take out one of the water jugs with a laser blast. And jammer Hot Slice makes her return to the track in this game after injury.
For the Sheep, watch June with a Cleaver, Jungle Lacy, Karma Krash, Penn Tupanga and Ruff’n the Passer. They are the blockers who control the other team’s jammer’s speed and set up the big hits for their fellow pack players. That is step one in Cincinnati’s attacking style of play: Making contact with the opposing team’s jammer, engaging with a block to allow another teammate to come in and explode into her.
This is going to be a fun game. These are two evenly matched teams that both want to win. They know what each other can do and how each team operates. I am expecting a physical contest with these four teams playing each other in a tight contest. Buy some tickets. There are going to be fireworks. Well, not literally. We are on a bit of a budget, which is all the more reason to bring your friends with you so that we can one day afford fireworks. Because this game should have them.
For ticket information for our April 6 double-header, College Night, click here.
Cincinnati vs. Bleeding Heartland Rosters
Cincinnati Black Sheep: Buckhead Betty 33 // CandyKICKass 32 // Hannah Barbaric 85 // June with a Cleaver 21 // Jungle Lacy 83 // K. Lethal 18 // Karma Krash 3 // Kitten Kicker 30 // Nuk’em 86 // Penn Tupanga 77 // Ruff’n the Passer 29 // Sadistic Sadie 76 // Sailor Scary 92 // Wheezy 43
Bleeding Heartland Flatliners: Manda Runyon 0 // Shifty Mcgee 12 // Kaka Caliente 17 // Dirt Diggler 130 // NaylorCoffenshutt 21 // Terror d’Bits 27 // Bobbi McGuillotine 225 // Shock’n Roll 247 // Special Sass 38 // Nuck L. Sammie 44 // Aceta Menacin’ 500 // Mauls Dolls 594 // Pele’s Melee 808 // Bombshell Shock 99 // Alternates: Patches O’Houlihan 11 // Dare E. Eryn 61
Cincinnati Violent Lambs: Big Ugly 72 // Bombtrack 12 // Cherry Choke 0 // Cincy Psych-O 99 // Hot Slice 71 // Juwana Hurt 4 // La Bruja 66 // MirderHER 44 // Pistol Whippin’ Wendy 38 // Poppy Chulo 27 // Railroad 6 // Roxx Solid 74 // Ruthless Chris 5 // // Sista Shovechild 2 //
Bleeding Heartland Code Blue Assassins: Manda Runyon 0 // Patches O’Houlihan 11 // Knitty Gritty 14 // Naylor Coffenshutt 21 // Scarlet Witch 311 // Special Sass 38 // Uh Huh Hurricane 407 // 407 Uh Huh Hurricane // The Gwen Reaper 415 // Mauls Dolls 594 // Dare E. Eryn 619 // Mersadist 70 // Biscuit Cutter 71 // Sock’emz Razor 762 // Goldilock Stock ‘n Barrel 82 // Alternates: Mad-Eye Maggie 23 // Bipolar Curves 314 // Mae Kim Hurl 4 // Eddie Muncher 727