CRG vs. Boston Preview

Cincinnati Rollergirls announcer-turned-writer Tank has a preview of the Black Sheep’s August 11, 2012 away game vs. the Boston Derby Dames’ Boston Massacre.

What’s up, Cincinnati Rollergirls Nation? It’s Tank and I am back again to talk about what’s new in the world of CRG. Summer is starting to wind down here in the Tri-State, which means that fall and all the great things that come with it are on its way. Seriously, I hate August; it’s such an annoying month. All of the big summer blockbuster movies have already been released, and there are no holiday weekends where you get to blow up things while eating and drinking your weight in hot dogs, potato salad and beer.
But most importantly, August is the barrier between us and the start of the NFL regular season and the WFTDA regional playoffs. It mockingly smiles at you the same way bars do when you’re 20 years and 11 months old. I hate you, August. If you were a person, I would kick you in your back down a flight of stairs or make you watch a Tosh.0/Mind of Mencia marathon, both being equally as painful.
The one good thing about August, besides watching the U.S. Olympic team win in the sports that matter (i.e., the sports that matter to us because we win them! USA! USA!), is that the Cincinnati Rollergirls will be on the road in action. On Saturday, August 11, the Black Sheep (5-5) will be shipping up to Boston to take on the Massacre (5-2) in a WFTDA sanctioned game. The past few years have been about as successful as Casey Affleck’s career after “Good Will Hunting” for both of these squads as they continue to try to recapture their past glory.
At one time, Boston was one of the premier teams in the East and roller derby in general. Over time, though, they have lost big name players such as Claire D. Way to Gotham and few other key skaters to other teams. The same can be said about the Black Sheep with Trauma leaving for Kansas City last season and their current roster lacking Nuk’em (returning soon from a tib/fib fracture) and Hannah Barbaric (on personal leave).
With Hannah out, the Black Sheep jammer rotation is now K. Lethal, Wheezy, Penn Tupanga and candyKICKass! This game will also see the Black Sheep debut of recent Rollergirls of Southern Indiana transfer, Sailor Scary. Both teams are ranked seventh in their respective regions going into the post season and are plagued with the same problems of beating the teams they should be able to beat and losing to the teams ranked above them.
This game is a weird dichotomy that means nothing and a whole lot at the same time. Allow me to explain. Since the WFTDA second quarter rankings came out we know both of these teams are slotted in the No. 7 spots of their respective regions, and nothing can change that (minus themselves or another team pulling out of the tournament). Also, since they are not in the same region, the impact of a loss for either team on their third quarter regional rankings will be relatively minimal. On the flipside, this is the last game Boston is scheduled to play before Eastern regional playoffs, and CRG only has one game left with Carolina before they go on to play in the North Central regional playoffs.
Both of these teams are going to want the momentum of a W propelling them into the playoffs. Boston has been more successful in wins and losses this year than CRG starting the year with a five-game winning streak, but the last time we saw them in action was at the East Coast Derby Extravaganza in June. They went 0-2 at EDCX, unceremoniously losing to the 3rd (Montreal) and 4th (Charm City) ranked teams in their region.
This one is going to come down to who is hungrier and who is smarter. The problem, of course, is that sometimes being hungry for victory leads to stupid penalties that smart players have to avoid to win.


Cincinnati Black Sheep: Buckhead Betty 33 // Candy Kickass 32 // Cherry Choke 0 // June with a Cleaver 21 // Jungle Lacy 83 // K. Lethal 18 // Karma Krash 3 // Kitten Kicker 30 // Mirderher 44 // Penn Tupanga 77 // Ruff’n the Passer 29 // Sailor Scary 4 // Sk8r-Kinney 11 // Wheezy 43 // Alternate: Railroad 6
Boston Massacre: Anna Wrecksya // Bad Person // Dee Stortion // Dixie Kicks // Ginger Kid // Hayley Contagious // Ivanna Shankabitch // Lil Paine // Maude Forbid // Maya Mangleyou // Salome Splatter // Shark Week // Space Invader // Vixen Ta Hitcha // Alternates: // Dottie Danger // Crown Joules